The way my day went today was just so annoying. I'm fine for the most part. I just want to say I think it's important to allow yourself to have one of those days. I woke up and I already knew it was coming but I started my period and usually how mine goes I'm fine until I start doing activity or a couple hours in I start feeling as if my body is slowly trying to take me out. I had three classes to go to today so I usually get up early in the mornings so that I have time to spend with God and myself before I go to class because it helps me feel grounded.

So I did my usual, I got up washed my face, brushed my teeth and ate my breakfast while doing my Bible study and you know just spending time with the Lord as I usually do and then I hopped back in bed because I usually have about an hour to myself and I was so tired I ended up just going back to sleep until it was time for me to start getting ready to go to class and I did exactly that. I got up, got dressed and everything and then went to class.

I don't know where y'all live but where I live it is so freaking hot and right now we're in this heat wave where even when it rains the rain is hot. It's really annoying and everyone is pretty miserable. Having to go to class and walk around in this heat is frustrating especially because my campus is all over the city so we just have to walk up all types of hills and everything and it's just annoying. Me personally? I'm not sure if anyone can relate to this but turning 20 has made me feel like I've hit puberty all over again because my body reacts to things completely differently now. I never sweat in my life like the way I do now and I don't know if it’s because climate change has it hot as crap or because I've gotten older but I literally feel like I'm drenched in sweat five seconds into stepping outside and it's the most annoying thing ever because I am very conscious about smells I do not play about smelling decent so it's I’m uncomfortable and obviously you do the natural things like take baths, put on deodorant but like sweat is sweat and it just bothers me because I feel like I can smell my sweat mixed with my lotions and perfumes and deodorants and it’s gross.

I know other people must not think that because no one avoids me or has said anything and people sit beside me constantly so I'll say I must not stink but they say that you no one smells you like you smell yourself so honestly it's not surprising but like I don't the smell of sweat and it's just grossing me out and I be ready to cry walking around campus feeling like a sweaty dude.

But anyways I'm already sweating a whole bunch and I started my period so by the time I was in my third class of the day I started cramping and I was really sleepy and I was getting a headache. I was irritated and I had a shin splint walking to class because I usually am in the same buildings on campus since my freshman year I've always been in the same areas but with my school they put the smallest majors on the outskirts of the campus so the art school is literally so far and I have 15 minutes to walk from the main part of campus all the way to the art school and it's the most annoying thing ever because like I said my school is pretty much around the city so I had to Dodge cars and everything else on top of it being hot and my stomach was cramping.

So I had to endure sitting in an art class which I'm sure is a very fascinating thing and I personally love art as a hobby but I have no passion for it and I could not care so I was pretty much miserable and counting down the time it was time to leave not to mention despite me basically running to class i was still almost late and there was barely any seats so had to sit right in front the professor, fighting not to fall asleep. When it was finally time to leave I felt a little bit better but then I realized that I didn't drive to campus today so I had to wait an hour for the bus. In the heat. With my stomach cramping. And a headache. No food.

By the time I got home the first thing I did was get in the shower because my stomach was hurting so bad and when I got out I took pain medicine, fixed a bowl of cereal for dinner because cooking wasn’t an option and I got in the bed and I haven't moved since. I also ate pretzels. I did my homework and I'm not going to lie, I half did it. I really didn't care, I was frustrated.

Anyway I don't know what my point of this is I just wanted to say something about my day because I was irritated and hot and I guess the whole of what I want to leave you with is just it's okay to have those days especially when you're sitting there in pain and not every day is going to go perfectly. I was frustrated but I made myself feel better because I just allowed myself to feel my pain and be a little bit of a slob in the bed because I wasn't in the mood even though it's a Monday and I could be getting stuff done I probably should be studying I just couldn't because all I wanted to do was sit in the bed. Thankfully tomorrow I only have one class and it's not till 1:00 p.m. so I can try to get things done tomorrow but I only goal for today was to do the homework for tonight and call it a day and that's exactly what I did I'm writing this block and I'm probably going to start getting ready for bed even though it's 7:00 p.m.

Thanks for reading! 🌸